He’d seen the video on a late-night YouTube spiral. A pale, bearded man with the calm, precise energy of a master mechanic explaining how to rip the engine out of a brand-new car and rebuild it only with the parts you actually need. The comments were a chorus of salvation: "My RAM usage dropped by 2GB." "It’s like a new machine." "Microsoft should pay this man."
It was day two of ownership. Day one had been a nightmare of pop-ups: "Try Microsoft 365!" "Back up to OneDrive!" "Would you like to make Edge your default?" A weather widget in the taskbar that showed the temperature in Timbuktu. A news feed full of celebrity gossip. Candy Crush, pre-installed on a $2,000 developer machine. win 11 debloat chris titus
Leo opened a browser. It launched instantly. He opened Visual Studio Code. Snappy. He tried to open the Xbox app. It wasn't there. He tried to open OneDrive. Nothing. He tried to find the "Tips and Suggestions" notification toggle. It no longer existed. He’d seen the video on a late-night YouTube spiral
The script finished. Leo chose the option to restart. Day one had been a nightmare of pop-ups: "Try Microsoft 365