2v2lol -

His partner, Marcus “Moke” Okonkwo, had 4 hours. He thought the “Q” ability was for quitting the match.

Moke just typed back: “I am made of raspberry. You are made of salt.”

Moke picked Poptart . Poptart was a sentient breakfast pastry whose only ability was to leave a trail of jam that made enemies slip. He had no gun. He was a joke character. 2v2lol

They were matched together at 2:00 AM on the NA-East server, the witching hour when the tryhards went to bed and the gremlins came out. Their opponents? “xX_Slayer_69Xx” and “LagSwitchLarry,” two streamers with matching neon skins and the coordination of a synchronized swimming team.

Leo didn’t hesitate. He emptied his clip. Every bullet, every ability, every cooldown. Slayer’s ninja parried the first three, but the fourth—a jam-covered, sticky, ludicrous shot—slid right through his guard and detonated in his face. His partner, Marcus “Moke” Okonkwo, had 4 hours

Moke’s Poptart jumped. At the apex of his pathetic hop, he hit his ability: . A massive sphere of sticky, purple goo exploded from his chest. It didn’t do damage. It didn’t stun. But it coated everything —the walls, the floor, the exploding barrels, and both enemies.

It was 4-4. Winner takes all. The map switched to Reflector Core , a circular arena of mirrors and lasers. One wrong step and you’d hit your own reflected shot. You are made of salt

Leo was dead in 1.7 seconds. First blood.